Techie Talk Print
Written by Mark Jones   
Monday, 25 January 2010 14:35

As we expand our administration we have needed to look at the church computers, networking and storage. I find it all very confusing, albeit necessary. You may be able to relate to following funny sketch.

 

Craig: I would like to help you set up your new office computer network system.
Mark: Thanks. I wouldn’t know where to start, but I'm thinking about buying a new computer.  
Craig: Mac?
Mark: No, the name's Mark.
Craig: Your computer
Mark: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
Craig: Mac?
Mark: I told you, my name's Mark.
Craig: What about Windows?
Mark: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
Craig: Do you want a computer with Windows?
Mark: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
Craig: Wallpaper.
Mark: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
Craig: Software for Windows?
Mark: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write sermons, track church members and run the Food Bank. What do you recommend?
Craig: Office.
Mark: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
Craig: I just did.
Mark: You just did what?
Craig: Recommend something.
Mark: You recommended something?
Craig: Yes.
Mark: For my office?
Craig: Yes.
Mark: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
Craig: Office.
Mark: Yes, for my office!

Craig: I recommend Office with Windows.
Mark: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a sermon. What do I need?
Craig: Word.
Mark: What word?
Craig: Word in Office.
Mark: The only word in office is office.
Craig: The Word in Office for Windows.
Mark: Which word in office for windows?
Craig: The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'.
Mark: I'm going to click your blue 'w' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track the church money with?
Craig: Money.
Mark: That's right. What do you have?
Craig: Money.
Mark: I need money to track my money?
Craig: It comes bundled with your computer.
Mark: What's bundled with my computer?
Craig: Money.
Mark: Money comes with my computer?
Craig: Yes. No extra charge.
Mark: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
Craig: One copy.
Mark: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
Craig: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
Mark: They can give you a license to copy money?
Craig: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few days later)
 Mark: How do I turn my computer off?
Craig: Click on START'...

(Adapted from an Abbott and Costello sketch)